Sometimes, have you ever wondered that when there's no purpose for living, there's no point of living at all? It's hard when you don't know what are your goals in life, I mean for example, when we were younger, there were certain periods that we will be looking forward to, like finishing high school, getting your driving license, or even graduating. I'm still halfway from getting my degree, but I feel like besides that, my family and God, I feel like I'm losing the interest, my desire, to explore and identifying the beautiful things in life. Maybe I'm just beyond the definition of boredom, to actually trigger my mind with these kind of thoughts. You know when you have nothing to do, and still wondering what to do, but did nothing in the end, yeah that's what I've been experiencing these couple of weeks. Maybe I just need to find something to do to occupy my mind and time, but there are too many distractions for me to finally do something which supposedly to be worthwhile, at the least, with my life. I should just get a grip, because I have to be thankful with what I already have so far in life. Getting more than what I have should be my motivation but it seems like that feeling of 'envy towards other people without effort of doing anything with your own situation' has been dominating my conscience. But no, I just have to shake it off and think more wisely and rationally with the things that matter most to me. It's still a long way to go, but I really hope that I'll pursue my goals to the extend of self actualization to really define what happiness really means to me, God's willing.
